Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Randomize
