what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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