It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
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