Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Randomize
