i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
