Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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