You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
