What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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