Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (646): View more from New York

  I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.

  (347): View more from New York

  And what brought this epiphany?

  (646): View more from New York

  I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (646): I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on. (347): And what brought this epiphany? (646): I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later http://tfl.nu/hsai
  Replies (27) Good night (3403) Bad night (577)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (503): I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt. http://tfl.nu/ymql
  Replies (17) Good night (4697) Bad night (670)
• Favorite

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (267): like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage http://tfl.nu/h40b
  Replies (96) Good night (3713) Bad night (5281)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009 http://tfl.nu/ne91
  Replies (5) Good night (3843) Bad night (638)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (407): the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever. http://tfl.nu/psk0
  Replies (14) Good night (6044) Bad night (567)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (301): let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child." http://tfl.nu/sqg2
  Replies (18) Good night (5587) Bad night (2720)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones? http://tfl.nu/hoh3
  Replies (8) Good night (1630) Bad night (3799)
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (949): you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one http://tfl.nu/7gmu
  Replies (10) Good night (6142) Bad night (1474)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (715): I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE. http://tfl.nu/ipmq
  Replies (6) Good night (932) Bad night (1122)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Cops are just so fun an beautifuk

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): Cops are just so fun an beautifuk http://tfl.nu/p8be
  Replies (2) Good night (697) Bad night (445)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now http://tfl.nu/jdhz
  Replies (8) Good night (948) Bad night (551)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (678): He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker. http://tfl.nu/0g20
  Replies (4) Good night (983) Bad night (308)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.

  (1-704): View more from North Carolina

  1. Thanks. 2. No.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (704): She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister. (1-704): 1. Thanks. 2. No. http://tfl.nu/698u
  Replies (6) Good night (465) Bad night (921)
• Favorite

  (334): View more from Alabama

  You're the horniest male I have ever encountered

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (334): You're the horniest male I have ever encountered (404): Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you. http://tfl.nu/3v94
  Replies (2) Good night (762) Bad night (276)
• Favorite

  (940): View more from Texas

  I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (940): I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer. http://tfl.nu/cak3
  Replies (3) Good night (728) Bad night (230)

Randomize