The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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