Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
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