I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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