i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Randomize
