Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Randomize
