I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Randomize
