Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
