she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
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