I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Randomize
