I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
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