Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
