ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
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