the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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