So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
