Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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