Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
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