barbara walters just said penis...
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
