ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
well you can't waste a boner
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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