I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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