I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
