Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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