i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
