There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
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