My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
