i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
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If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
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Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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