the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
So squirting runs in the family.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
