i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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