Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
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