honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
