how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
farters have to be the big spoon...
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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