well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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