In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
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