i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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