i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
