trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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