I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Randomize