Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
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I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
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