I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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