it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
