omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
