remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
